Professional Facilitator - Matt Cartwright
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We are a leading Facilitation Company helping business, groups and organisations achieve better, simpler, faster, clearer and lasting outcomes.   

We improve the process, performance and produce more  value in your business, group meetings, customer experiences, and stakeholder engagement.

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“Hang on... one thing at a time….”

14/3/2012

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“Hang on... one thing at a time….”

”huh…” says the multitasker and drama queen who just loves 12 hour working days.

We are busier than ever. Thanks technology and consumerism. Okay it’s great, it just increases my choices and decisions. Of course I love being productive and doing work that is meaningful and purposeful. 

So here are some useful strategies for your organisation or your work team.  These strategies are likely to increase productivity and more innovative thinking if you model and encourage set periods to focus, as well as shorter periods to renew. 

As a past manager, here are three guidelines I’d like to share with you, there are more, but I Iike these 3, they are easy and effective. 

1. Manage meeting boundaries

Schedule meetings for 30-45 minutes, rather than an hour or longer, so people can stay focused, take time afterward to reflect on what's been discussed, and recover before the next task. 

NO meetings straight after lunch.  That’s’ known in the facilitation world as the lullaby period.  Avoid it if you can.  

Start all meetings at a precise time, end at a precise time, and insist that all phone calls not be taken, unless they have an urgent family matter. 

Meetings must have an agenda, purpose, and a clear intended outcome. 

Record minutes only if really, really needed. Seriously do you need them??   

Another meeting process I like to use is team huddles, (or cuddles, if you get along real well) They are short sharp 5 -10 minutes focused on an issue and then disband. I pick a time near meal breaks so not to disrupt the flow of other work.  Then say, what are you doing for lunch???? 

Team socialisation opportunity….!

2. Stop demanding or expecting instant actions of others 

I ask people to get back to me by generally by COB, (close of business) rather than in 2 hours.  I find the quality is better and the resistance is lower.  If I say 2 hours it puts me under pressure as well.  The goal is to get your people out of the pressure cooker, release the valve a bit, stop being reactive.  Maybe you could be more organised and forecast some the issues. On the odd occasion there will be the odd pressured moment, why, that’s because someone upstream is reactive or disorganised or there is a real emergency (well….you would like to think so wouldn’t you?)

Reactivity is not flow time or engaged time, it fragments focus, and makes it difficult for people to sustain focus on their priorities.  In Lean Thinking we call this waste.

My tip to all people is if it’s urgent, please call me, don’t email me, call me.   

Next….Stop harassing people and being an urgent drama queen.  You’ll survive, the more urgent orientated that you are, the less time you will have…trust me.

3. Encourage Breaks

Create at least one break time during the day when you encourage your people to stop working and take a break, in fact I do it twice a day. It forces me to stop to.  I’ve read and heard about others taking a group walk or workout, relax, or take a nap.  Personally I've never napped.  I do however go for walks.  Many years ago I worked with two men who routinely slept at morning tea and they always woke up…amazing.

Okay…you have their backs covered what about yours?

Consider these four behaviours for yourself, you are not superman or superwoman you know.

1. Do the most important things first in the morning or whatever time your work day starts, preferably without interruption, for 60 to 90 minutes, with a clear start and stop time.

2. Establish regular, scheduled times to think more long term, creatively, or strategically. If you don't, you'll constantly enter the world of the the urgent.   Visit my blog on email use. 

3. Take mini breaks, breakations, real and regular holidays. Real means that when you're off, you're truly switched off from work...now that's a test for many of us….. Hmmm, I think I might plan one of these breakations right now…

4. Delegate it, defer it, dump it, do something that you ought to do...  I think that will help, don't you? There will always be problems to solve as long as we keep changing, that's business. 
When you're fully engaged at work for defined periods you’re happier and more productive. Some people refer to it as flow.  It makes sense and saves the business bottom line and your stress levels

Stop working and living in the crazy time zone  

Go for a walk, smell the roses, see the sky and breathe the fresh air.   In my case it’s taking the stairs, walking past a tropical garden, crossing a busy road, chatting to the barista and getting a decent coffee.  Then I re-engage fully in what matters.

7 Coaching Challenges

  1. What are you tolerating at work that reduces your productivity?
  2. What behaviours do you need to change to get more focused time?
  3. Who do you need to start saying "no" to?
  4. What do you need to stop doing and delegate?
  5. What meetings need to be more focused and how will you achieve and do that?
  6. What obstacles might get in your road?
  7. How will you overcome them?
 
If you need help please feel free to drop me a line. Our job is to inspire people, inspire business and inspire results.

Journey well,
Matt Cartwright

Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12 
  
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4 Irrefutable Facts about Motivation

8/3/2012

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4 Irrefutable Facts about Motivation

I’m having a download but it’s to help you…trust me.. it will motivate you to think differently about work and life….   

After consulting with a client I was reminded by the impact of another leader’s motivation.  This leader was indoctrinated in a culture of hierarchy and glass ceilings. This hierarchy used power of the stick and carrot.  

There have been many occasions where I have been asked to assist managers with a low performing employee. I have in the past reluctantly and sometimes thought it's too far gone but organisations are often keen to assist their staff.  That’s a positive!!!  


One of the biggest problems is we still have a number of leaders/managers working in the last century paradigm of carrot and stick mentality. It’s rife... have you noticed it?

Let's face it, people are not donkeys... although some might beg to differ, there are some stubborn people out there.....know anyone?

The carrot and stick mentality paradigm exists in organisational culture today both overtly and covertly.  Nevertheless after working two years with an organisation I had discussions about recommending a performance framework (ahhh, the one they didn't even have!!!) to a transformational framework and employee engagement framework.  This leader just didn't get it.  It was about balance sheets. 


Guess what I got ????? I got the stick across the backside and that was my last assignment in that organisation.  I was glad..... It was no good me transforming people on the ground if the head honcho used last century behaviours in a modern world.  That organisation still has ongoing issues with retention and recruitment.

Carrot and stick motivation, you are a donkey if you really believe it works 


It's short term and so will be your business. What you sow is what you get, be careful what carrot seeds you sow……So I’m taking you to the new focus.  

Your Motivation “Operating System, Donkey 1.0. Needs an Urgent Upgrade to Transform 1.0

So what will Transform 1.0 offer new users?  Transform 1.0 is a metaphor…okay… stay with me. Read on….It simply offers new understanding based on research that shows the gap between motivation and business needs. The old version Donkey 1.0 does not work well with new browsers. 


Questions for You or other send them to them to the blog...

#1 What drives any of us to perform at our best? 
     Is it money, fear of punishment, reward or is it something more than that?

The secret to high performance and satisfaction at work and at home is the deeply human need to direct our own lives, to learn and create new things, and to do better by ourselves and our world.  

There is mismatch between what science knows and what business does and how that affects every aspect of life. While carrots and sticks worked successfully in the twentieth century, that’s precisely the wrong way to motivate people for today’s challenges. Do you agree or disagree?

Four elements of true motivation 
In my research into motivation there are four elements of true motivation

  1. Autonomy
  2. Mastery
  3. Purpose
  4. Meaning

If you are an organisation or small business or an individual reading this and you need to know more about motivation then Inspiring Results can help you. I’ll know if you’re motivated because you may call or email me. Transform your work and how you live.

Old management techniques are like using an old software system for your computer, it's slow, unresponsive, and doesn’t work with new programs.  Motivation is the same.  We have decades of science that shows the way. This approach has four essential elements:

1. Autonomy, the desire to direct our own lives

2. Mastery, the urge to get better and better at something that matters

3. Purpose, the yearning to do what we do in the service of something larger than ourselves

4. Meaning, Man’s search for meaning is the primary motivation in his life and not a secondary
                  rationalisation of instinctual drives. (Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning,1959)

Now…Imagine a workplace environment where leadership mandates that all senior managers or managers must report on their key performance targets ensuring that their staff are increasing their autonomy, mastery, meaning and purpose at work.  “Are you serious?”… “You bet that I am.”  That would be kind of fun.....it would get us all talking that's for sure.

Imagine if all staff were appraised not only on their technical roles and abilities at work but also on their work key performance indicators such as autonomy, mastery, meaning and purpose.

7 Coaching Challenges... are you motivated yet???
  1. How autonomous are you in your current role in your work environment? 
  2. How much meaning do you personally get from your current work environment?
  3. How much purpose do you feel about you current work environment??
  4. How effective are you mastering the key areas of your work or personal life?

If you manage people then answer these questions.

  1. Who in the team could you give more autonomy to?
  2. Who in your team could you ensure are mastering key areas of their work performance?
  3. Who in your team have you had an in-depth discussion about their sense of meaning and purpose in relation to their work?

It's obvious, it will be easier for some businesses to keep their heads in the corporate sand as a way out of the complexities of motivation. In the long run, however, I believe that those businesses that stand by their people will have that goodwill returned many times over.

Keep motivated. It’s not easy sometimes, but it’s harder if you don’t…one day at a time... 

Journey well,
Matt Cartwright

Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12 
 
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It’s not what happens to you that matters, it’s what happens in you

7/3/2012

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"It’s not what happens to you that matters, it’s what happens in you” 

The phone call ended like this today. “It’s not what happens to you that matters, it’s what happens in you”

I’m writing this post after a discussion with a personal friend of mine, a teacher, my mentor and my mother. A woman whom has tirelessly given to less fortunate people in many times when she herself was less fortunate.  I thank her.  She inspires me to keep writing, giving and following my career aspirations. I hope this post benefits you an dothers.

The Cure 


Let me reassure you happiness can't be bought, mental peace cannot be injected or swallowed and no market can sell mental peace and happiness. 

Overcoming difficulties at work and home has no magic pill, prescribed or non-prescribed.  The big Pharmaceuticals will debate this……

The latest research is clear that the key to a happy life, now and in future is to develop a happy healthy mind.  However you also need to take action and shift your focus.  Many of my past clients have benefited from learning sustainable mind shifting strategies.   Whether this is cognitive behavioural or solution based coaching.

The important point is that happiness in the workplace can be positively changed if you only change the way you think about the situation, how to reframe the situation, and how to take a different course of action.

Have you noticed the negative ripple effect of some people in your organisational environment?

When people in the workplace are negative and criticising, they are uncertain about the future, their roles and responsibilities, there is a lack of praise and recognition.  This obviously impacts on workers happiness considerably. Hence, productivity is reduced.

Tolerance


Tolerance is very important.  If you have tolerance, you can easily overcome difficulties. If you have little tolerance or none at all, the smallest thing immediately irritates you.  One of the keys to success is determination, with an optimistic attitude. 

The happiness advice is pretty consistent.  If people seek happiness from the outside world, from money or power, then they are in for one heck of a roller coaster ride of ups and downs. 

Real peace comes from within oneself. 

Unless our work or careers are linked to our values, meaning and purpose and our existence, then we are going to be limited in our ability to feel completely happy.

I know and confess in the past I have done work for works sake.  And, I wasn’t very happy.

One of the key messages to take way from this post is to try to strike a balance between your outside world and your internal world and focus on trying to get the inner world balancing in the right direction.   However, let me remind you the outside world also needs modifying. That is, your role in it.

Remember, it’s the inner experience that matters most not the outer experience.  So those of you stuck in a negative workplace or whatever situations start sorting the inner experience out.

There is one enemy, it’s inside you.  It is natural for all of us at work, home or with friends to externalise the causation of our unhappiness.  This results in anger, attachment, jealousy and hatred, these are the real enemy of our happiness journey.

Here is a free ticket for the happiness ride, enjoy and be happy.

12 Free strategies to help increase your happiness at work and home

1.      In the past month, how happy have I been really? (be truthfully honest )
2.      Where would I rather be on a score of 1 to 10?
              On a scale of 1 to 10 how rate yourself (1 very unhappy,  5 happy sometimes,10 very happy)

Ask yourself the following and answer them by writing your answers down. It helps, trust me.

1.      What small things could I do to move myself further to that score that I want?
2.      What is my role in the current work or life situation that makes me unhappy?
3.      What and how am I contributing to the situation
4.      What are my attitudes that I change about the situation?
5.      What positive actions can I take to get a positive outcome?
6.      What will I take responsibility for in this situation?
7.      What changes am I not prepared to take in this situation?
8.      If I don’t change how happy will I be?
9.      If I do change how much happier might I be?
10.    What’s stopping me from changing?

Journey well,
Matt Cartwright

Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12
  
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7 Things Great Employees Do

6/3/2012

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7 Things Great Employees Do

A great read......This definitely isn't the first time somebody's written about what makes employees special. But it may very well be the first time someone's telling you what will genuinely get your management excited about you and ultimately get you promoted. No kidding. Read More 
Journey well,
Matt Cartwright
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Success Leaves Clues, Download the Free Software

6/3/2012

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Success Leaves Clues, Download the Free Software 

One of the biggest hurdles is the software that runs in our brains. It's almost like we have inadvertently downloaded a virus that operates on our mindset slowing down our performance, speed and efficiency in achieving our goals.

Having coached and counselled thousands of clients, my experience tells me that it’s not so much ‘what to a mange to move forward” but it’s working out “how to move forward”.  This concept separates high performance/significance versus mediocre performance/existence.

Finding the sweet spot lies within us but unfortunately most people and businesses are searching outside of themselves.  My observations are that people need to spend a lot more time developing inwardly versus outwardly.    Being successful or achieving more significance leaves clues.

The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex, overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks. Then start on the first one. That doesn’t mean it has to be done by you. I struggled for many years with the concept of asking for help and delegating.

I had all these ideas in my head and I had expectations of how things were to be achieved.  It was just easier if I did it, then it would be done the way I wanted it.  It took me some time to give up this mindset. Yes, the pressure cooker in my head had no room for more work or more demands. The term “Let go” stuck with me one day.  That was also a day I let go of one of my former bosses.  It has been one of the major secrets to my success. 

I have found that being successful and improving performance leaves clues.  I make it my business to help people find the clues to achieve their success.   Whether it’s a project, a new business venture, a new strategy or a new partnership.

The high performer goes searching for clues.  The implications for not searching are obvious….

Here is something for you.  “Nothing is really new”.  It has been done before. 

Okay, want to know more?

Whether it’s in the mind or on paper, many of our issues, problems have been dealt with before.  There is a concept of sameness everywhere we go.  Many businesses have the same objectives, same challenges all over the world. There are 7 billion people in this world, all with creative and intelligent minds in their own right.  We basically all share the same DNA.  The difference is that some people make different decisions about what they think about.  These decisions combined with actions achieve different results.

The Clue

Personally, I tend to ask for help where I can.  I don’t waste time in trying to always work the problem out. I have found many people willing to help.  On the flip side, I have encountered many people will not. Let go of them.  These people control information because they live in a world of fear and insecurity. That is, they are attached to an imagined concept of self-importance or attached to an image of themselves losing something.  They are afraid of co-workers finding out the real person behind the position.

Do you know the person in the office who controls knowledge or skills in fear that someone might use it and look better than them? 

Remember, by being a person who is a multiplier and not a divider of information makes very good sense. If your work area is not operating like this then you’re losing power and influence.  Most importantly you’re losing staff engagement, customers and potential profit.

Many of us in the corporate world unfortunately have reinvented the wheel due to the fantasies of self-importance which are underpinned by our self-limiting beliefs.  The belief that we must achieve the task on our own and that we will be rewarded for our efforts.  Too many people have the mindset that sharing the problem or asking for help is a sign of weakness or incompetence.  In fact, this is the hallmark of a successful leader, an enlarger and a multiplier.

Your job is to ask people smarter than yourself for the information. 

It's knowing your people, knowing their skills and seeking out their abilities to assist you.

One of my suggestions is to review your business or project management knowledge management policy, processes and systems.  I see much duplication, rework, overprocessing, overproduction, wasted effort, wasted talent, wasted time in meetings etc.  Not good for people, not good for profit.

Not real good at all….

We are in knowledge worker economy…..Work smarter, not harder.  People will thank you when you raise the following questions in your business or project meetings.

  1. Is this the best way to do this?  
  2. Is there a better way?  
  3. What could we improve?  
  4. Who will we get involved to help us?
  5. When can we get started?

Challenge

Let go of fantasies of your self-importance.  That is “Ego”, stop saying “I” for one day at work.
Find someone like a coach, mentor or colleague to help you.
Write an action plan, do it, review it, change it, reward it.
Encourage your work area to have knowledge fairs, mentoring schemes, lunch and learn sessions or breakfast byte meetings tec.

Get Started, success leaves clues, the software is everywhere and free.  So ask for it and keep asking….

Journey well,
Matt Cartwright

Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12
    
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A war on email, I survived and so did others

5/3/2012

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A War on Email, I Survived and So Did Others.

Some time ago I started a war on my email. I survived and won the battle. Yes... there were only minor casualties. I put an automation rule to respond to my work email to deal with the deluge.  One of my email accounts had over 3000 unread emails in it.  I’ve turned that account off.   It can’t be important to me.  I simply just don’t value it and it’s never important.  Its information overload.

I have survived and I haven’t been in trouble about it. I have had the occasional “didn’t you get that email? Of course I did, I just hadn’t got around to reading it”

I operate a number of email accounts to manage my workload.  I tried something like this recently and this and it worked a treat.   I suggest if you do try it, tell your team or boss and do it as trial for a week. Tweak it to make it work for you and your team.

I set up an auto responder email. It read:

“Thank you for your email. I read my emails twice a day and respond to them accordingly at 12 midday and 4pm.  I read email in order of business priority.  If you are sending me a meeting appointment, please send the agenda and the meeting outcomes that are required so that I can prepare accordingly.

If that matter is urgent please ring me and leave a message and I will call you back as soon as possible.  Thank you for your understanding as this helps me manage time more effectively and serve you better. 

Have a great day.
Regards Matt”


I told my immediate coworkers in advance if you need me, just call me and still send me the email.

I then put my landline phone and mobile onto message bank and observed what happened.  Surprise people stopped sending me unnecessary emails and the phone calls dropped off.  I have now created more productive time.

Other people’s urgency no longer became mine. Within a week I increased my productivity time.  It was hard the first day.  I was used to the amphetamine pellet dispenser responding to  most email as it came in.  I went cold turkey and turned it off and back on at 12pm and 4pm.

It bothered a couple of people.  It was an experiment.  I was challenging the status quo.  Like all good experiments there are lessons and sometimes causalities.  I gather those people didn’t quite understand my needs or priorities. They assumed I waited around for email.  They operated in the urgency paradigm not the high performance paradigm.  Just a reminder if you are not applying Stephen Coveys Important and Urgent Matrix, you are losing precious time.  Consider applying it for at least 3 days and check your progress. It's a mental, behavioural and attitudinal shift.

The Important and Urgent Matrix

This tool, developed by Stephen Covey (Covey, 2004), helps people set priorities and learn how good management means putting first things first and organizing and carrying out work based on priorities. This tool helps people learn that the most important thing is not managing time; it is managing ourselves.

The Importance of Effective Self Management and Prioritization

Quadrant I  Represents things that are 'urgent and important'.   Quadrant I activities are usually "crises' or problems'. They are very important, but if not careful Quadrant I activities can consume you. As long as you focus on it, it keeps getting bigger and bigger until it dominates your work. There will always be crises that require immediate attention, but how many things are really that urgent?

Quadrant II includes activities that are `important but not urgent'. It is the quality quadrant, where you plan and anticipate, and prevent things that otherwise might become urgent.

Quadrant II is the heart of effective personal leadership. This is where you should spend most of your time!

Quadrant III includes things that are "urgent but not important". Plenty of managers spend too much time in this quadrant. The urgency sometimes is based on someone else's priorities.

Quadrant IV includes activities that are "not urgent and non important". It is the "waste of time' quadrant.

If you’re strong and able, try and have an email free day……once a week or once a fortnight or once a month.  We are far to addicted to email ecstasy, love or hate it. Choose your work poison wisely.

Journey well,
Matt Cartwright

Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12   
 
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Karpman Drama Triangle is Alive and Well in Projects

29/2/2012

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Karpman Drama Triangle is Alive and Well in Projects

Blog Warning.  You may find out something about yourself and….I had trouble keeping to a word limit on this post.  I’m not apologizing, it’s just a warning.

I was witness to a memo today, only because of the high level of distress it caused in a colleague of mine.  A classic all time smoke and mirrors job.  Old school style really, but you still see it.   The recipient’s names were not even attached, they were referred to as positions not people, no use of their personal names, and their position titles were incorrectly identified. “A Classic” and it was written by..... "Ahhh, I’m not going there….I don’t play those games"

It was unclear, it had no alignment to strategic or operational priorities and showed no concern for the welfare of this high performing and autonomous team. There was absolutely no respect or regard for these professionals or their work contribution.  It was old school management operating in a contemporary paradigm. 

So why do we still see this?  Well let’s just say that in this case that person has been in a very senior role for a long time.  You have to wonder why have they being perversely incentivized.  That is, bad behaviour gets rewarded. 

  • Do you know what I mean? 
  • Have you seen it? 
  • Have you experienced it?
That’s right, these behaviours physically wrench the guts out of people.  This negatively impacts on their personal lives and reduces performance, productivity and finally results in resignation.  This then costs the customer in the long term.

In discussion with my colleague, it was easy for me to be hooked into the saviour role, her level of distress was genuinely warranted.  At a deeper level, it appeared like she may become the victim, the CEO was the bully and I began to assume the role of rescuer.  But wait there is more….  I had no life jacket ….no rope….and no real desire to be taken down as well.

On this occasion, my role was to validate her feelings, express concerns about the situation and help her focus on what she had power, influence and control.  It seems a little non-empathic, but it is reality.  High performance people don’t hang on to negative people.  You have 2 choices, stay or leave.

In the corporate, government and small business world poor management practice still exists and will for a long time yet to come. I’m being upfront. It is. Look at the behaviours of our officials in government.  Look at what goes on in the tea room/coffee shop or smokers shack at work.  What gets said?

Simply covert and overt bullying and conflict is not managed well. 

Project teams are at enormous risk.  People move from project to project and business to business. 

One thing that you must understand is this. You must understand the interplay. If you don’t, you will be played, and the injuries and losses aren’t pretty.

The Karpman Drama Triangle was originally conceived by Stephen Karpman and was used to plot the interplay and behavioural moves between 2 or more people in conflict. I suggest you read his work.

The most common office and project team game that I observe is the game called the "Dysfunctional Triangle". There are three players: the Victim, the Persecutor, and the Rescuer.

What makes this dysfunctional triangle game interesting is that everyone changes roles.

In fact this model is used to describe bullying in schools and to help kids change their behaviours.  This model is also used in domestic violence counseling.  The paradigm has enormous merit.

I have taught this model to most of my clients and teams.  Why?  So I empower them with the knowledge and self-awareness to regulate their own choices.  I am a great fan of those who accept ownership, accountability and responsibility.  They are inspiring and admiring qualities. 

I guarantee, we have all played the roles at some time in our work lives…. if you’re upfront with yourself.  I hope that most of you recognize it. Your job as manager or leader is to ensure others understand the triad.  Spend a good half an hour with your team on it.  Refer them to this post.  Get them talking about it.

Drive them, enable them, empower them…..

When I was managing projects I often discussed this model in the early days when people start whining, criticizing or defending others.

Below are typical statements, I’m sure you have your own examples.  If you’re part of the conversation, you could be part of the triangle.  Triangles are reinforced by the three sides.

THE DYSFUNCTIONAL TRIAD

Victim           ("it was better under the old regime or project")

Persecutor    (someone representing the cause of the Victim's apparent misery. ("Just do it!" You are being moved regardless), insensitive ("I don't care if…..)

Saviour         The Saviour expresses concern ("yes, I know, I know,”), offers help ("I'll finish the job for you, it’s awful what they have done, they shouldn’t do that), and is the go-to person for everything, often and also known as the rescuer

The key is to be aware and not play the game.

  1. Think about how this might occur in your work area.
  2. What is your preferred role?
  3. When does it change?

ACTION


By actually talking action you get closer to what you really want in your work life.

  • What roles do you play work?
  • What roles do your team members play?
  • Who are they?
  • What behaviours need to stop?
  • What behaviours need to start occurring?
  • What behaviours will you change in yourself?


Remember if nothing changes…. nothing changes
      

Journey well,
Matt Cartwright

Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12
  
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Tips for dealing with the present, the past and the future

16/2/2012

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Tips for Dealing with the Present, the Past and the Future

This simple but very powerful review process is used to shift your thinking, behaviour and attitudes.  

I have counselled, coached and mentored with thousands of people.  The most common theme, I find is people find reasons (excuses) to make changes until sometime in the future, and yes I have been guilty as well. Living in the Now or Present, needs to opened up and needs regular check-ins...

So....Be in the present: When you want to be happy and successful 
  • Focus on what is right, meaningful or purposeful now
  • Use your purpose to respond to what is important now
  • The present is all that you have, make the the most of today, who knows if tomorrow exists, do you really know????
  • Work and live as if today were the last, confronting I know.... but it will shift your attention onto action, if it doesn't then you need to go back to the first point
Now...Learn from the past: When you want to make the present better than the past
  • Look at what happened in the past, don't over-analyse yourself or your business, its not an autopsy
  • Learn something valuable from it, ask what can I learn from that experience
  • Let go, it only really appears in memory, don't hold regrets, if you do, you're in victim mode
  • Do things differently in the present, take responsibility, be accountable, be authentic
And...Plan for the future: When you want to make the future better than the present
  • Visualize what a desired future would look like at work, home, social, family,etc get it clear
  • Make very specific plans to make it happen, it must be targeted, realistic and achievable  
  • Put massive amounts of action into the plan for today, not tomorrow, remember, we are in the present
  • If you start procrastinating, you operate in the fear paradigm, its real in your head I know, but it may not be in reality, most fear is created in our lives and in our business.  Trust me I've done it.....
Have you got it yet?  Good.

The future is not tomorrow its here. Too many pepole stil haven't got that important nugget.


Enjoy this small coaching present and pass it on.  Giving is a great way to improve business and the world we live in.

Journey well,
Matt Cartwright

Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12
  
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The Art of Happiness in Unhappy Times

15/2/2012

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The Art of Happiness in Unhappy Times

This week I met with a close friend of mine, who is a Psychiatrist and he always greets me with " you call this living Matt?"   I laugh and respond with " yes, it sucks doesn't it, but isn't it great?" 

It got me thinking as I drove home late that night, there is a message in this, to share with others what I have learnt in the 20 or so years of counselling, coaching and mentoring people.

I was asked once at a course last year "what is your purpose in life?"   A bit confronting as this was a group I didn't know at all, nor had I thought about preparing for such a question.

I fumbled my response out, "to help people", but that didn't cut it.....I was challenged..... "isnt it to learn how to live with more happiness and help others do the same?"  They were right...  

That's what leads me to blog about happiness at work and home and hopefully you will find something that helps you or others. 

"I am the author of every next moment"  is my mantra.

Why? It helps me focus my thoughts, speech and behaviour at both work and play.  It helps me on the happiness journey... and that it is folks... some destinations are just not enjoyable, but I learn from them, sometimes it take me years to figure it out.

Maybe I'm a slow learner, but the teacher presents when the student is ready as the saying goes.

So this week, what the bleep is there to be happy about????? 

Here are some things I dug up in the  news media:

World poverty, war, famine, degradation of human rights, disease, suffering, homelessness, joblessness, broken families, abuse, 1 in 5 suffer from a mental illness, chronic disease, government corruption, dictatorships, employer layoffs, and so on, and so on.... aint it awfull, aint it awful.  Well yes it is.  Don't keep awfulizing.

I challenge you accept these four truths: 
  1. Suffering exists
  2. Suffering will continue to exist
  3. There are ways to combat it
  4. Practise ways that increase your resilience and happiness.

There is heaps of stuff written on happiness, world conferences,  thousands of self help books, courses etc.  Just Google it, megalinks everywhere....

The best and most current research that I suggest you go to is the website of University of Pennsylvania  and look up Authentic Happiness,Martin Seligman.  I'm also a major fan of the HH Dalai Lama's teachings on happiness as they are timeless, evidence based and practical and have thousands of years of  practiced techniques.  His Holiness is always smiling, go  figure... his country Tibet was run out by the Chinese Govt of the time.

Key messages are to practice: 
generosity, compassion, kindness, forgiveness, tolerance, ethics, wisdom and concentration.

My message to you 
I share this with you because I can't post everything on this topic, nor should I try.. so here go a few ideas....in no order of merit.....

"be optimistic, practice gratitude, buid intimacy, develop your personal strengths, let go, maintain a social/network, have a faith, practice mindfulness, maintain your health, take courage, change your mindset/attitude, practice being more adpatable/flexible, give up the need to control, give up trying to be perfect, go and volunteer, practice gift giving, go an travel, go and learn something new, make real love, get in touch with nature, find or create your meaning and purpose, let go of pride and be humble, that is let go of your ego.......make a choice to be happier and act on it daily, make it a habit, be thankful everyday.... we often create our own internal unhappiness...that my friend we have control over. 

No victims, no excuses please, just survivors


Still want more,okay....

8 Steps Toward a More Satisfying Life
Want to lift your level of happiness? Here are some practical suggestions from University of California psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky, based on research findings by her and others. Satisfaction (at least a temporary boost) cited in Time Magazine Time Magazine  January 17, 2005.

1. Count your blessings.
One way to do this is with a “gratitude journal” in which you write down three to five things for which you are currently thankful—from the mundane (your peonies are in bloom) to the magnificent (a child’s first steps). Do this once a week, say, on Sunday night. Keep it fresh by varying your entries as much as possible.

2. Practice acts of kindness.
These should be both random (let that harried mum go ahead of you in the checkout line) and systematic (bring Sunday supper to an elderly neighbour). Being kind to others, whether friends or strangers, triggers a cascade of positive effects—it makes you feel generous and capable, gives you a greater sense of connection with others and wins you smiles, approval and reciprocated kindness—all  happiness boosters.

3. Savor life’s joys.
Pay close attention to momentary pleasures and wonders. Focus on the sweetness of a ripe strawberry or the warmth of the sun when you step out from the shade. Some psychologists suggest taking “mental photographs” of pleasurable moments to review in less happy times.

4. Thank a mentor.
If there’s someone whom you owe a debt of gratitude for guiding you at one of life’s crossroads, don’t wait to express your appreciation—in detail and, if possible, in person.

5. Learn to forgive.
Let go of anger and resentment by writing a letter of forgiveness to a person who has hurt or wronged you. Inability to forgive is associated with persistent rumination or dwelling on revenge, while forgiving allows you to move on.

6. Invest time and energy in friends and family. 
Where you live, how much money you make, your job title and even your health have surprisingly small effects on your satisfaction with life. The biggest factor appears to be strong personal relationships.

7. Take care of your body.
Getting plenty of sleep, exercising, stretching, smiling and laughing can all enhance your mood in the short term. Practiced regularly, they can help make your daily life more satisfying.

8. Develop strategies for coping with stress and hardships.
 There is no avoiding hard times. Religious faith has been shown to help people cope, but so do the secular beliefs enshrined in axioms like “This too shall pass” and “That which doesn’t kill me makes me stronger.” The trick is that you have to believe them.


Journey well in your happiness,
Matt Cartwright
Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12
  
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Making Decisons in Uncertain Times

15/2/2012

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Making Personal Decisions versus Decision Dramas

Okay most of us are faced with personal and work based decisions that from time to time are tough.  Yes me too, I''m not superman. 

Here are some typical possible decision scenarios in a day 
  • Will I change jobs, sack the boss, or take a vacation???
  • Will I buy the new car, lease or hold onto the current one???
  • Will I buy that new laptop???
  • Will I invest in staff training?
  • Will I, will I, will I, oh know its too much......
  • What will happen if I make the wrong decision???
  • Will I leave work early to be home with the kids?
  • Will I sort out the project team mess or leave it a bit longer until the next meeting?
  • Will I change our business processes this month or leave it a bit longer?.....And the rest of the day is filled with them, right! you bet ya.....they are.
 “Your decisions influence your actions to either avoid pain or move toward pleasure”

It’s your life, are your decisions helping you achieve more of what you want from it?  


Making decisions for many people is a struggle. “What will I do here, What will happen if I don’t do it, how wilt this effect me or others, if only I knew what to do, it isn’t fair, I’m stuck, what do I do and so it goes on until one day the opportunity has passed by or they get there but it hasn’t exactly been easy.  

There are many decision making tools that you can use, but the simple and effective approach is often overlooked especially to personal decision making.

So how do you make better decisions? The secret lies within how you think, what you do and how you interpret your world.  What references you attach to your decisions makes the difference, for example:

Decide to have a holiday versus decide on want to have a holiday. The first approach decide to have a holiday gives direction and action, whereas decide want to have a holiday is a preference which may not result in action or commitment.  The pain might be saving more money which means less time with friends in the short term or the pleasure might be relaxation, meeting new people and seeing new places.

What I have learnt is the the key to effective decision making is to maintain your motivation and to see yourself moving in the direction you want to go and what benefits you will experience.  I also know from my neuroscience research  that brain likes pleasure, so make decisions pleasurable not painful.

Decision Points, Read and Take Action...It Helps.

  • Decide to have versus decide on wanting to have.
  • Action focuses you on direction.
  • Take consistent action to achieve more results.
  • Making good decisions requires practice, the more you make the more the energy you get, the more likely you learn how to move toward what you really desire.
  • Decide what to focus on.
  • Ask yourself what does this mean to me?
  • Ask yourself what do I do now?
  • Take massive action.
  • Notice what is working and not working.
  • Change your approach until it works.
  • Stay flexible but committed.
  • Link pain or negative consequences for not taking action.
  • Link pleasure and positive consequences for taking action.
              “Fear of failure is created in our minds, so are dreams and realities”
 “Coaching helps you make decisions and reach your goals faster and more effectively.  You can always achieve more from life and work, just contact me at Inspiring Results to find out how. 

Journey well,
Matt Cartwright
Inspiring People, Inspiring Business, Inspiring Results 
© Copyright 2008 -12
  
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